Apparently, as senator, I need to keep my constituents up-to-date with the happenings of senate. Hence the Senate reports. In this way, you, the cherished members of the HCL can be kept abreast of the vitally important legislation being created in the senate and can provide feedback and just be involved in the political process. This would involve me saying, the senate passed a resolution supporting senators passing resolutions in favor of pointlessness for the purpose of making themselves feel important. If you really want to know what is going on in Senate go to the website, http://senate.asuw.org/. Or even better, you can take over the position from me and pass resolutions to your heartr’s content.

In the last three senate meetings a lot of important things were accomplished. A resolution was passed in support of cake and people were elected to positions where they will have limited to no actual power. Your illustrious senator did her math homework, Italian homework, and math homework in each meeting respectively. I also voted in support of the cake. In addition to the homework, which I successfully complete in senate, I made some important observations.

1. Stupid people like to hear themselves talk and also talk louder than normal people. They are the bane of my existence. There are two senators who feel the need to comment loudly on everything, yet the few times I even attempted to follow what they were saying, I could not even fathom what their point was. Remember mad-libs, where one fills in blanks randomly. Those make more sense than these people. They should listen to our former president Abe Lincoln who said “Tis better to be silent and be thought a fool than to speak and remove all doubt.”

2. Some people go to senate meetings for fun. This behavior is completely beyond my comprehension. Masochists.

3. Actually that was all my observations but I’m putting my conclusion in the list because I feel that a list of two items is pathetic and I am too lazy to reformat this report. If you have any questions or important resolutions that need to be passed, feel free to e-mail myself or go ahead and write the League at. And look forward to another report, eventually.

quote of the week: “Success in almost any field depends more on energy and drive than it does on intelligence. This explains why we have so many stupid leaders.” —Sloan Wilson

Jill