Database Revived (2007)

Last June, disaster struck the Honors Croquet League. Our database, the records, statistics, and heart of the webpage, went down and was not able to be fixed. For the next six months, the current Executor (290) was unable to enter match records, upload photos, schedule matches, or commend Players of the Month. To make the situation even more difficult, the Treasurer/Membership Coordinator/Compatriot Extraordinaire (175) left town for New Zealand. The League was in dire straits.

Over the months, records were kept on paper, all involved hoping that nothing would be lost in these dark times of the League. Several database-savvy individuals offered to help revive the database, but it was recommended against by our database creator (001), saying that the whole system was currently “Sprung like a trap.”

But in the dark month of December, Nicolas Addington returned to Seattle from Wisconsin and spent a great deal of his time in the state fixing up the database and adding new editing features to the website. Since then, the current Executor (290) has been working on entering all of the backlogged information into the database. Soon the website will be caught up to speed, and the League will reclaim the distinction of being the best-run student organiztion on campus. Check back frequently for website updates. At the time of this writing, four new Player of the Month blurbs have been added to the website.

Celebrity Responses Received (2006)

Many months back, in the summer of 2005, letters were sent out to thirteen dignitaries of all sorts, requesting their presence at the October croquet match and their service as celebrity judges in the CFR Scholarship competition. These dignitaries were The Right Honorable Paul Martin, Prime Minister of Canada; Jim McDermott, our own representative; Christine Gregoire, Governor of the State of Washington; Ryan North, author of the online Dinosaur Comics; Ira Glass, radio host of NPR’s “This American Life”; Matt Groening, creator of “The Simsons”; Barak Obama, progressive Illinois senator; Guitar Wolf, eponymous guitarist of the band Guitar Wolf; Noam Chomsky, Professor Emeritus of Linguistics at MIT; Desmond Tutu, Anglican Archbishop of Cape Town and winner of the Nobel Peace Prize in 1984; Nancy Pearl, librarian of Seattle Public Libraries and model of librarian action figure; Mr. T, of The A-Team; and Gary Larson, author of The Far Side comic strips.

Each was sent an official HCL letter detailing their qualifications (including such embellishments as “skill at oratory delivery,” “authorship of a though-provoking periodical,” and “general awesomeness”), outlining the goals and positions held by the League, and the purpose of the scholarship.

Of these thirteen dignitaries, seven replied with regretful declines. Archbishop Tutu’s personal assistant Lavinia Browne wished us a “lively and exciting event.” The Prime Minister’s Special Assitant Liz Yong-Lafleche let us know that “The Prime Minister appreciates your interest and has asked me to thank you.” Ryan North “regretfully regrets” not being able to attend. Damian Cordova of the Office of Congressman McDermott wrote, “U.S. Representative McDermott applauds the goals of the Honors Croquet League, and offers his congratulations to this year’s awardees of the C.F.R. Scholarship F.” Noam Chomsky himself replied with, “Just received your letter. One of the more unusual invitations, and a pleasant idea. Hopelessly impossible, I’m afraid.” Other responses came from Governor Gregoire and Nancy Pearl.

Although the League did not reach its goal of sending out 500 letters and having at least one celebrity attend, (mailing addresses are difficult to find!) a 58.3% response rate is encouraging and bodes well for next year.

HCL Featured in P-I (2005)

Thanks to the media draw of the Lakewood Croquet Club, our longtime associates in croquet in the Seattle area, the Honors Croquet League was featured prominently on the cover of the Getaways section of the Seattle P-I on June 2. The article included several full-color photographs of League members Brandon Martin-Anderson (094) “Resplendent in a Utilikilt,” Michelle Burce (290), Cameron Newland (492) and Dulce Hernandez (493). Choice excerpts include, “‘We feel that croquet is a basic right, like e-mail and ballpoint pens. … Anyone who charges for it is oppressing the masses,’ states the HCL, which preserves the game’s more prim, classical form.” ExExecutor Nicolas Addington (001) would point out that the ellipsis takes the place of the phrase “and poorly-written local newspapers.” We speculate that freelance writer Amanda Castleman did not want to jeopardize her future at either the Stranger or the Seattle Weekly. The full text of this article can be found here.

Sportcraft Set Recovered (2005)

The Honors Croquet League, in an attempt to promote political awareness and support Karl David Smith (465) in his bid for ASUW Director of Operations, and also to celebrate the birthdays of three prominent League members (040, 175, 181), had arranged a match on the HUB Lawn at noon against members of the Represent! ticket. As the League members were assembling and beginning setup, a Rock Your Vote tabler shouted at us, “Hey, you guys play croquet? We play croquet!” At this, he brandished a croquet set that looked remarkably similar to those stolen on Greek Row in March of ’04. After an incredulous moment, Emily Jane Price (084) marched over, took the set, and brought it to the assembled croquettiers for inspection. Sure enough, there on the front was pasted a white label reading “Honors Croquet League” and our address, #6. Sportcraft #6 (of 8) had reappeared. At that point, the game was off and the sleuthing was on. When further pressed with questions about his identity, we discovered that this croquet set was provided by one Nick Huntington of the College Republicans and Theta Delta Chi, whose friend’s girlfriend found it on the street one night. After an intense impromptu good-cop/bad-cop (also referred to as, “hot-cop/mean-cop”) routine by Michelle Burce (290) and Brandon Martin-Anderson (094), backed up by 6-8 mallet-brandishing League members, names and phone numbers were acquired, but those under questioning were determined to be just about as innocent as they seemed. No further leads have been uncovered. Sportcraft #6 is in poor shape, but we are glad to have it back.

50th Match Smiled on by Weather (2005)

On January 23, the League celebrated its 5th birthday. Just three months later the League celebrated its 50th match (semi-centennial) in style. It rained all morning, but as the cart pulled into the Quad at 1pm, the rain stopped and the sun came out. The notable event was marked by the release of the new design of official tee shirt, featuring a skull and cross-mallets bedecked in a jaunty chapeau.

Rippey Scholar Named (2004)

On October 2, the C.F.R. Scholarship F. finally came to fruition 365 days after its endowment on October 3 of the previous year. The assembled croquet memebers, led by Distinguised Celebrity Judges Brandon Philip Martin-Anderson (094), Champion of the North and the South, Camden Michael Basil Davis (044), the Most Senior Voting Member and All-Campus Champion 2004, and Randolph York Hennes (314), Upstanding Figurehead Celebrity Extraordinaire, enjoyed six quality speeches about the nature and profundity of this game we call croquet. Joseph Viguers Groves (185), was named the first Rippey Scholar, on account of his eloquent and fecund croquet-filled speech. His declaration that croquet “vaguely counts as exercise” brought the cry of “Huzzah” from the crowd, but that was only the beginning of Joe’s fine showing. When he brought up “cultural rhubarb,” the assembled members were roused to great merriment. His speech ended on the vaguely political mention of “So let us see to it then, that if the day should come when we too must rise up against king George for our own liberty, that we do not go to our deaths for having poorly handled our mallets.” Indeed.

Other applicants for the Rippey Scholarship included Rebecca Diane Stecker (337), Kashena Jade Konecki (311), Jill Ann Edwards (426), Philip King Corliss (150), who brought the crowd to cheers as he took off his shirt, and Arcadia Lynn Corbett (436), who also made a fine showing with a poem declaring, “Next time you send him, use a postage stamp!”

As the first Rippey Scholar, Joe received the first of three installments of $5. Much like the Mary Gates Endowment, the second and third installments will be dispersed at the beginnings of Winter and Spring quarters, respectively.

Arlington Repossession Mission (2004)

During the Tour of the North, three croquet sets were accidentally abandoned in Arlington, WA in Haller Park. They were recovered by Officer C. Hirotaka of the Arlington Police Department. In the Police Report, Hirotaka describes the scene thusly: “3 duffle bags, maroon in color, found just east of the restrooms in Haller Park on 8/8/04 at approximately 22:45 hours. No one was in or near the park entrance.”

Thanks to the foresight of our Executor, Nicolas Addington (001), the name and address of the Honors Croquet League was printed on every bag. The League was notified by mail, and four members, Chris Carrico (010), Brandon Martin-Anderson (094), Raz Barnea (152), and Michelle Burce (290) ventured to Arlington to recover the lost sets. The incredulity of Officer Nancy Lingel of the Arlington P.D. was apparent as she declared over the phone, “We actually have three croquet sets.” Upon arrival, the recovery party became momentarily lost as they were told that the Police Department was not in fact part of City Hall. When the department was finally reached, thanks to a map procured at City Hall, the sets were returned without much ado, and they are now safely back in the Croquet Office. Brandon Martin-Anderson speculated, “I think they [Officer Lingel et. al.] were happy to see us, because of all the people that visited the police department, we were the only ones not asking about guns. I think the croquet sets brought a welcome feeling of frivolity to the Arlington Police Department.” Nicolas Addington commented, “Now if only the UWPD would recover the lost sets from last March…”

The recovered property notification, map, and police report are on file in the office and will be incorporated into the library when our esteemed Librarian (055) returns from Denmark.

Arlington PD Case #04-2238
Evidence#1649

PoM Scandal Retrospective (2004)

In February of ’01, the Honors Croquet League was rocked with scandal. The month before, the Executor, Nick Addington (001), had created the Player of the Month program so that the web site would have something interesting to read on the front page; before that, web surfers would often end up reading the membership records or the constitution before they became bored and went away. The first PoM, Nena Bonn (020), met with no objection, but when Addington selected Grant Mandarino (005), who had not come to a match in four months, as the second PoM, two members (003, 036) took umbrage. In the ensuing scandal, Addington was nearly impeached.

The full text of the debate surrounding the fledgling PoM program has been posted to the web in a new retrospective, providing a rare window into the early days of the League. To read the e-mails, click here.

Senate Endorses All-Campus Tournament (2004)

On May 11, the ASUW Student Senate passed R-10-34 at the eleventh hour, supporting the Honors Croquet League and its All-Campus Croquet Tournament which took place on May 15. The ASUW Board of Directors approved the bill on May 20.

The unexpectedly controversial bill was detained in committee for several weeks and debated at length by the full Senate as Senators objected to a clause describing the League’s membership. Originally, the clause read:

Whereas The Honors Croquet League is an organization whose membership is open to all peoples of the world, excluding one individual, a Mr. Yuri Barron, with whom we had a heated exchange regarding a slew of offensive emails he sent to our league in autumn 2001

While Raz Barnea, the bill’s sponsor and Senator for the League, strove valiantly to convince the Senate that this was a statement of fact and not an unwarranted attack on Mr. Barron, eventually he compromised with his opponents and the disputed clause was removed.

The bill’s approval came at the end of a very long and tiresome Senate meeting. Shortly before R-10-34 came to the floor, Cammie Croft, the Senate Chair, realizing that the number of Senators present might have dropped below the quorum of 44, called for a quorum count and found exactly 44 Senators to be present. The next day, the quorum situation and the Honors Croquet League’s beleaguered bill appeared on the front page of The Daily in an article entitled “Senate Ignores Quorum Rules.” The League was pleased to appear in the Daily for the fourth time in as many years, although admittedly its previous coverage had more to do with croquet.

Theft on Greek Row (2004)

Eight of the Honors Croquet League’s croquet sets, generously donated by Sportcraft, Ltd. in 2002, were stolen on the evening of Thursday, March 11. After the night game on Greek Row, the League went to Lauren Brown (087)’s apartment and parked its shopping cart full of croquet sets in the parking garage underneath her building. Upon leaving, we discovered that the Sportcraft sets were gone. Only those eight matching sets were taken; the other, arguably nicer sets and the cart itself, which was chained up, were not taken.

The sets are in matching green cages and are marked with our name and address. Eight croquet sets are bulky and terribly inconvenient to store and transport, and we expect that if they’re in the U-district, they’ll turn up eventually. We have contacted the Interfraternity Council and Panhellenic Association, but have gotten no response. If you have any information regarding the whereabouts of our stolen sets, or are interested in donating to the embattled Croquet League, please write to croquet@u.washington.edu.

C. F. R. Scholarship F. endowed (2003)

Caitlin Fields Rippey (003), recent graduate and croquet luminary, has endowed the C. F. R. Scholarship F. to support and encourage future croquet luminaries. She would have liked to call it the “C. F. R. Scholarship Fund,” but Fermat-like, the memo line on her check was too small to contain more. Donations to the F. can be sent to Honors Croquet League, SAO 48, Box 352238, Seattle, WA 98195-2238. An application process and eligibility criteria are still in development.

Cait was the champion of the League’s inaugural match on January 23, 2000. Of this, it was written, “When you see her on campus, you should now address her as Your Mallet-Wielding Highness.” She was absent from the following three matches, during which time she held the title “Undefeated Unchampion,” until her stylish defeat in University Place that July. Since then, she has attended an astounding 22 matches, becoming an institution in the League, a leader in fashion and je-ne-sais-quoi. During the South Campus Tour of 2001, Cait’s mother, Helene Steese Rippey (096), traveled from her home in Morocco to join the League, and the two were the Players of the Month that March. In June of 2003, Cait graduated from the University, and has gone to live with her family in their new home in Uganda for six months. We thank her for her generosity in establishing the C. F. R. Scholarship F., and congratulate her for her vision.

Barnea interviewed on KUOW (2003)

On July 31, local NPR member station KUOW had a special on their Weekday program dedicated to oddball and lesser-known sports. Raz Barnea (152), coordinator of the Honors Croquet League’s Outreach Programs, called in to the program was interviewed by host Steve Scher. Click here to listen to Raz’s interview.

HCL competes in LCC Champions Cup (2003)

Four of the Honors Croquet League’s top players (001, 003, 092, 262) competed in the Lakewood Croquet Club’s 52nd Annual Gary Coleman Memorial Team Challenge in Lynnwood on July 12. Earlier that day, a fuel tanker had exploded on Interstate 5, and our intrepid competitors joined every other motorist in driving five miles an hour down Aurora Ave. Fortunately, the LCC was also detained, and a logistical snafu was avoided.

HCL featured in The Daily (2003)

The Honors Croquet League was featured in The Daily on April 4. Click here to read the article.

HCL wins Lobby Day Challenge (2003)

Affordable Tuition Now!, a student group committed to “fight against excessive tuition increases, and to fight for increased financial aid and state funding,” organized the Lobby Day Challenge on February 27. Students bused to the State Capitol in Olympia to meet with legislators and lobby for the interests of higher education. ATN! offered $250 to the student organization that sent the largest team.

The Croquet League’s delegation was, as they say, a force to be reckoned with. Twenty-one of our faithful members took the afternoon off and rode to the Capitol in search of fortune, glory, cheap tuition, and free lunch. The next largest group brought only eight people to Lobby Day, so the promised $250 is ours. We will use this money to expand our Library, finance the All-Campus Tournament in May, and pay our routine operating costs (mostly stamps). $250 should last a long time.

Our enthusiasm and esprit de corps may have overwhelmed some of the organizers and participants from other groups. A few students from Ruckus, who are also members of our esteemed League, reprimanded us for putting croquet before lobbying. We would point out, however, that in addition to playing croquet, nearly all of us met with legislators, and with our help, Affordable Tuition Now was able to make a strong statement in Olympia.

Library apologizes for recent acquisition (2003)

The Honors Croquet League Library’s screening of Alice in Wonderland (1999) on January 24 was a resounding flop. After half an hour of technical difficulties, the audience was subjected to one of the dullest films in recent memory. Jessica Blat (055) and Nicolas Addington (001) apologized to those in attendance for the evening’s feature and promised to select future Movie Night offerings more carefully. Click here to read Raz Barnea (152)’s scathing review of the film.

Motto and Mascot Contest winners announced (2003)

The Honors Croquet League has adopted the motto “Ingenio maximus, arte rudis:” Greatest in genius, rough in skill. This phrase, used by the great Roman writer Ovid to describe Quintus Ennius, the founder of Roman literature, has been selected as the final winner of the Motto Contest. Feiya Wang, member number 160, submitted the winning entry. While the selection committee was concerned that this choice would play into the hands of the League’s detractors who accuse us of elitism, it finally decided that if they can’t handle a little self-mocking hyperbole, let ’em hang.

The League’s official Shopping Cart was selected as the winner of the concurrent Mascot Contest, but unlike the motto, this suggestion could not be attributed to a single source. The Cart was chosen over Pink Flamingo by a narrow margin. The motto and mascot will be juxtaposed to make a t-shirt which we believe will be a boon to fashion and hipness everywhere. Plans for the shirt’s production are still in the works.

The Motto Contest was suggested by John Pyles, member number 036, in response to the dissolution of the Weather Service in October. Pyles collected the entries and headed the selection committee, as well as providing biting commentary at the expense of many. The contest rules stipulated that mottos in classical Latin be given preference over those in other languages, embodying the high-class spirit of the League. The initial announcement specifically encouraged the submission of raunchy Latin puns (reflecting the occassionally bawdy character of the works of Ovid, Vergil, and others), but this had to be revised. The Mascot Contest was an older suggestion by Sam Coskey, member number 109.

Croquet League opens office in HUB (2002)

The Honors Croquet League will share an office with the Husky Paintball Club in HUB SB-31 beginning on Monday, October 13. After only a year on the waiting list, we received this exciting news last spring, and have begun moving into the space formerly used by the College Republicans. League Members and the general public may visit us in our new home during our regular hours, 1:30-2:30 on Mondays and 12:30-1:30 on Tuesdays, Wednesdays, and Thursdays. The office will be used to conduct official business and meet with prospective members, and will eventually house the Library and serve as a headquarters for the Equipment Checkout Program. We are grateful to the SAO and SAUF for their generous allocation of resources.

Yuri Barron Retrospective (2002)

By popular demand, the e-mails which constitute the infamous Yuri Barron Scandal have again been posted on the web. In the winter of 2001, Mr. Barron responded to an invitation to join our humble League with a semi-coherent string of epithets, and a modest flame war ensued. To this day, Mr. Barron is the only person barred from joining the League. To read the e-mails, click here.

Editor’s note: These e-mails contain language which is not appropriate for children or anyone with a shred of respect for women, Afghans, Jews, residents of Belfast, castratti, cats, or Yuri Barron.

Sportcraft to sponsor 2002–2003 Season (2002)

Sportcraft, Ltd., maker of fine recreational sporting goods, has agreed to provide equipment for the Honors Croquet League’s 2002–2003 season. This is a huge windfall for the League, whose current equipment has seen better days. A modest grant from the University Honors Program permitted the acquisition of two new sets in April to accomodate a sudden influx of new members, but the League’s earlier garage-sale-caliber equipment has since begun to break under the strain of the All-Campus Tournament and Seattle Parks Tour. Sportcraft will provide some eight croquet sets by the opening of the season on October 5.

As a term of the sponsorship, the League will display a 3-foot by 7-foot banner bearing the Sportcraft logo at its regular matches beginning in October. This requirement was generally well-received by League members, with little concern over selling out to The Man. Ben Handy, Director of the HCL Weather Service, commented, “Contrary to popular belief, The Man does have an important role to play in the croquet league. I think this is a very good offer. The Man has something we don’t: The Man has money. We have something the man doesn’t: We have fun (and we are just as capable of having it next to their large signs).”

ASUW Senate grants seat to Croquet League (2002)

The ASUW Student Senate amended its Bylaws on May 28, granting a seat to the Honors Croquet League and three other organizations, mainly Fraternaties. After a year of concerted effort and nearly three years of idle speculation on the part of the League, the petition for a seat was approved with little controversy. Nick Addington, member number 001, defended the petition before the Senate with a brief speech, and three Croquet League members who represented other organizations offered their support. Laura Kogler, member number 030, represented the League at the final Senate meeting of the year. Elections for a permanent Senator will be held in the fall.

All-Campus Tournament covered in The Daily (2002)

The Daily covered the All-Campus Croquet Tournament in an article printed May 21. To the great amusement of all who attended the Tournament, the article appeared on the Sports page. To read the article, click here.

University Week, the faculty and staff newspaper, also printed a photo from the Tournament on May 23. To see this photo, click here.

Croquet Sets available to check out (2002)

League members may now check out croquet sets for personal use. This new service comes in response to the desire of numerous members to play pick-up games on sunny days, which have become more frequent with the arrival of Spring. Sets can be checked out at 315 McCarty Hall. Members should call ahead at (206) 934-2885 or e-mail croquet@u.wasington.edu.

Blat to head Library (2002)

Jessica Blat, member number 055, has been named Librarian of the Honors Croquet League. Having worked for almost a year in the Sno-Isle Library System, she brings both experience and vision to the post. Her duties will include maintaining the existing collection of four volumes, checking out materials to members, and acquiring new books.

Croquet League receives Grant (2002)

The Honors Croquet League has received a small grant from the University Honors Program to cover the cost of new croquet sets necessitated by our recent surge in membership. The grant also includes a promise of matching funds for donations raised from other sources. Anyone wishing to donate money or equipment to the should contact croquet@u.washington.edu. We are grateful to the Honors Program for their generous support.

43 attend January’s match (2002)

The Honors Croquet League’s match on 12 January had more than twice the attendance of any previous match, bringing our total membership to 80 people. Ruchi Kapoor, member number 008, wrote the following account of the game at Court C:

One of the most intense, and incredible matches ever… Never has such a game of croquet ever been played in the two-year history of Honors Croquet League. We played through fake-rain (because of course HCL Weather Service can never go wrong), cold, mud, photography, people walking through, and all sorts of interruptions. Shoes squished, players almost slipped and risked broken legs and arms, mallets and balls and mud and grass were flying everywhere in a fast and furious frenzy.

There was some incredible sending demonstrated by the Vicious Duo: Ben Handy and Casey Borgen. Their playing elicited some strong words from even the sweetest person’s mouth, and made them some serious enemies on that particular court. For the record, everyone departed on mutual feelings of awe and respect for all the players, regardless of words and feelings demonstrated during the actual game.

Major decisions were made by the ultimate arbitrator—Rock, Paper, Scissors. Shirin won the round of whether the Blue Ball was truly sent by the Black with her paper over Ben’s rock. And Casey S&M won the round of the Duo of the Month with his rock over Shirin’s scissors. In a side comment, in this writer’s opinion, both teams equally deserved to be on the Honor’s Croquet League’s Homepage… Alice’s playing/sending without shoes was amazing and definitely eye opening when it comes to croquet footwear. And both pairings ability to lead in spite of Ben-Borgen sending strategy was absolutely remarkable.

Words cannot even begin to describe the adrenaline rush, the passion, the screaming, and swearing that all went towards making this game so memorable. Not to mention the joy everytime Ben-Borgen Ball was sent… the Dancing routine developed by Ms. Kapoor hardly begins to express it. Everybody was kept on their toes, teeth were grinding, people (again mainly Ms. Kapoor) were on the verge of insanity till the final outcome of the game. A 40oz bottle of cheap beer can hardly match the intoxication of a well-played croqet match. Congratulations and hats off to croquet players all over the world.

HCL embroiled in battle of words (2001)

On November 29, the Honors Croquet League sent out a general invitation to its December 1 match. Yuri Barron, a UW honors student, replied with an e-mail that insulted croquet players everywhere. After consulting Jon Banfill, member number 012, who was mentioned in the e-mail, we rebuked Mr. Barron and, in an unprecedented action, barred him from ever joining the League. A flame war ensued between us and him. The complete text of the e-mails can be found here.

Sensitive readers are warned that these e-mails contain offensive language. Concerned readers are assured that this is all in good fun, an no one has actually been offended. Yet.

Weather Service organized (2001)

The Honors Croquet League organized its own Weather Service on October 10. Ben Handy, member number 017 and star of the All-Campus Tournament, has been appointed Director of the Weather Service. His duties will include forecasting sun on days that we play and making other predictions at his discretion.

Ben was selected for the post after his rash prediction of sun on October 1 held for an entire week, to widespread amazement. In a statement released October 13, Ben said, “At first I thought predicting the weather was hard. Then I realized I was approaching the problem wrong. The key is in actually changing the weather.” We wish him a long and successful tenure.

HCL Library founded (2001)

Jimmy Lin, member number 018, has founded the Honors Croquet League Library. The Library will provide books on croquet and other topics for our members’ reference and literary enjoyment. The Library will be housed in the Official Cart until we are assigned an office in the HUB.

Jimmy’s founding donation is a book on all aspects of the game which he bought at Powell’s bookstore in Portland with Ben Handy, member 017, and Allison Wong, member 007. The book has chapters on rules, strategy, decorum, ethics, and fashion.

To donate books or money to the Library, please contact us. Donations are tax-deductible if you falsify your return.

HCL plays in 2001 Champions Cup (2001)

The Honors Croquet League competed in the Lakewood Croquet Club’s sixth annual Champions Cup on July 21 in Woodland Park. In our first inter-club competition, we made a respectable showing, with two of our players holding the lead for a time. The LCC’s Jeff Gepner won the Cup, returning to former glory. We felt a great sense of camaraderie with this worthy rival group, and have been invited to return next year.

All-Campus Tournament a success (2001)

The Honors Croquet League hosted an All-Campus Croquet Tournament on May 19 in the Quad; it was a grand conclusion to the 2000–2001 Season. With a banner on the side of Kane Hall and a day of tabling on the HUB Lawn Friday, we managed to draw 24 students to participate, half of whom were new to the Croquet League. Mark Steedman, a freshman, swept the tournament, followed by Nate Miller and Ben Handy in second and third places. We plan to hold the All-Campus Tournament annually.

Mysterious Rival League Contacted (2001)

The Mysterious Rival Croquet League, of which we had heard many rumors but nothing concrete, has been contacted. Cait Rippey, member number 003, found approximately ten people playing croquet on the HUB Lawn on the afternoon of May 2.

They seemed to be proficient practitioners of the game. Upon questioning, we learned that they also advocate all-terrain croquet, one of our favorite pastimes. Quoth one of their number, “There are two kinds of people in the world: croquet players, and those who’d like to be croquet players but can’t because they’re dead.”